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The following article was published in Your Health Magazine. Our mission is to empower people to live healthier.
Lynn L. West, PhDc, BCETS, LCPC
Inappropriate Touch
Lynn L. West & Associates, LLC

Inappropriate Touch

Children today grow up in a world where the distinction of what is or is not appropriate touch is not always clear-cut and specifically defined. Further, many adults in our culture feel uncomfortable about articulating behaviors that violate one's personal or sexual boundaries, thus children may not get clear guidance or fully understand what is clearly unacceptable behavior with respect to someone touching their bodies. Then these children grow up into adults who are involved in supervising and protecting children from harm, based on what they learned as children.

When there is no clear understanding of personal boundaries and integrity of character, situations such as the recent Jerry Sandusky and Bernie Fine scandals are much more likely to occur and flourish because adults feel embarrassed, ashamed, or fear humiliation whena sexually chargedsituation occurs. Nobody should feel this way. Lack of clear information and fear of becominga target themselvesif they say anything makes adultsmore reluctant to intervene. Instead,many adults donot act at all, which is turning a blind eye to the situation a clear act of omission on the part of the adults.

Inappropriate touch is a serious offense that is always intentional and usually coercive on the part of the victimizer, and always a perpetration on the individual who is being touched. The action involves one person putting hands on another person in a hostile and exploitive way. It does not matter whether the victim interprets the behavior as being inappropriate; it is only that the behavior violates personal or sexual boundaries and is not appropriate.

Questions arise about the appropriateness of the habit in sports games for males and coaches to smack other males on the buttocks as part of the ritual. Should this be considered as inappropriate touch even though it is a habit?

Inappropriate touch is just that it isinappropriate. It is not horsing around, playing,or unintentional in its action. It's a boundary violation and it is a serious offense. Make sure that you, as an adult,are clear in your physical and sexual boundaries and that you act to protect other adults and children when they are being victimized. Adult supervisory guidance will go a long way in making inappropriate touch disappear.

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