Expert Tips for Managing Autistic Meltdowns

By Your Health Magazine

Your Health Magazine

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Expert Tips for Managing Autistic Meltdowns

You overslept on an important day. You’re already running late, and you need the rest of the morning to go smoothly. Cue: the autistic meltdown — the very thing you don’t need, but stressing and yelling can’t fix this tantrum; you need to stay calm. How do you handle it when you’re feeling anything but that?

There’s no guaranteed way to handle any child’s meltdown, but when your little one has autism, chances are, there was a trigger somewhere. Knowing the trigger might not help right now, but you can still manage the meltdown and get your child happy and your day back on track with these expert tips.

1. Start With De-escalation

Think of the last time you were upset and your spouse or friend told you to “just calm down.” How well did that work for you?

Exactly. And your child’s autistic meltdown isn’t going to go away with those “magic words,” either. 

Instead, de-escalating starts with calmness. Don’t react to the tantrum negatively. Stay calm, even if you’re bubbling up inside with frustration. The sooner you can project a calm demeanor, the faster you both feel it for real.

Soothing tones calm the nervous system, telling your little one that they aren’t in danger anymore. Slowly, their heart rate and breathing will steady, and their amygdala (fight-or-flight) goes back to normal. This effect is why meditation works so well when we’re stressed — it’s a biological process that starts with babies and continues into adulthood. For children with autism, soothing voices from someone they trust are the first step to safety.

2. Redirect Attention

If you’re seeing the early signs, it’s possible to avoid a full-blown meltdown by redirecting your child’s attention. What do they enjoy the most? How can you distract them from the triggers that are upsetting them?

This tip isn’t ignoring the problem, but it is keeping you both calm while you attempt to deal with it. For instance, the meltdown trigger might have been your neighbor’s lawnmower making a loud noise. By moving your child into another room and letting them color or watch their favorite TV show until the noise stops, you’re helping them regain control over their emotions.

For cognitively appropriate settings, consider discussing the event and how they could choose to handle it better in the future. This article by BehaviorSpan includes a list of helpful books on the topic of behavior management strategies for parents and guardians of children with autism.

3. Increase Movement

Does your child enjoy dancing? Sports? Other physical activities? Any type of movement might be all it takes to prevent or stop a meltdown. 

Movement naturally lowers stress levels and reduces feelings of overwhelm. Children with autism may need a hormone release that they don’t understand, leading to frustration and meltdowns. When their stress levels are reduced, stimuli become more manageable.

It’s not always possible to head to the park and let them swing or jump in the pool, but having a quick physical solution on hand can de-escalate a meltdown fast. Weighted blankets provide gentle pressure that promotes calmness, while jumping on the bed (with supervision) might be a treat only reserved for the two of you on “special occasions.”

4. Control the Environment

Meltdowns aren’t always controllable, but the safety of your child and those around you is pa riority, even when the situation seems embarrassing or stressful.

If your child is safe but screaming or otherwise acting out and you can’t de-escalate easily, turn the focus to removing any hazards from the area. Dim the lights, turn off the TV or music, and try to minimize any sensory triggers. If you can, move to a quieter location.

No matter how well-prepared you are, autistic meltdowns don’t always follow the rules. Redirection, movement, fun, calm tones, and options are all good strategies to have on hand, but sometimes we all just need to let out our stress — and your child’s meltdown is doing just that.

The key is to be there for them throughout the meltdown, reminding them that they are safe and cared for to provide a calm transition when they’re ready.

Conclusion

Figuring out how to handle the stresses around us is hard for everyone, including grown adults. Children with autism, for whom social skills and emotion regulation is already challenging, may hit a breaking point that turns into an autistic meltdown.

Managing these meltdowns is going to look different for everyone and every situation. What works today might not do any good tomorrow, and that’s okay. Keep these tips in the back of your mind, have a few effective redirection methods on hand, and be there for your child before, during, and after their meltdown — the rewards are worth it.