How To Love Someone With Depression

By Jane Jackson, MD

New Vitality Health Center

More Mental Health Articles

How To Love Someone With Depression

If you have ever been in a relationship in which you loved someone that had an episode of depression you are one of millions of Americans that are going through this situation. This includes mothers, spouses, classmates, friends, and lovers. This can be a very frustrating and confusing experience and it may be acute or chronic.
Just why doesn’t this individual act like his or her normal self? Do they all of a sudden dislike like me? Are they lazy? Are they just trying to get sympathy? Why are they suddenly irritable about everything?
Actually, the answer is no. They could be having a bad day but if they are displaying these behaviors for at least two weeks in a row they could possibly be suffering from a clinical depression.
A clinical depression is actually a medical illness and not a character flaw or a weakness. It is an imbalance of the neurotransmitters in the brain, which include the chemicals serotonin and nerepinephrine predominantly. These can be rectified with certain antidepressants and cognitive behavioral therapy.
It’s not your responsibility to try to “snap them out” of this type of behavior, besides it does not work. Instead, I have some sound recommendations on how to support the person suffering from depression.
Ways To Help Someone
Who Is Depressed
1. Don’t ignore the situation and simply turn the other cheek. Talk to the person, but most of all listen to them about their feelings, particularly if they have any thoughts of wanting to hurt themselves.
2. Help them make a “pro and con” list to consider the merits of decisions they may need to make because right now they probably could not make a decision if they tried.
3. Help them get their chores and errands done. Sometimes they haven’t even been able to tackle their mail, groceries, or laundry because they have been so overwhelmed by everything. That is why they have been the ultimate procrastinator that you never knew before.
4. Get them out of the house to enjoy some fun activities and break the focus on the depressing thoughts that have consumed their attention. A change of scenery will do wonders to rekindle their interest in their usual work and recreational activities.
5. Lastly, if their depressed mood seems to linger on and their behavior and perspective on life is interfering with their home, social, or professional responsibilities I strongly recommend that you encourage them to seek professional help from a mental health provider.