Inner Beauty

By Mary Baker, LCPC

When you read the words inner strength, inner beauty, being captivating, what comes to mind for you? How do you see yourself? Have you truly tapped into your strength, or are you still silently suffering because you are not okay with where you really are? Did you even think about who you are when I asked that question?
“If you have placed a certain criteria to feel worthy, then you have placed a lie into your mind.” This is a wonderful quote I saw the other day.
Up until this point, your level of self-acceptance was determined by how you were loved and valued by important people in your life and then internalized into the (good) tapes that play in your head. If you didnt get this, allow yourself a good cry over it and rejoice because now you can give it to yourself! You can admit who you are, what you value, go down the list of all of your wonderful strengths and accomplishments, embracing your uniqueness.
Get rid of all of the negative self-talk, shaming judgment and self-condemnation that you must have learned from somewhere. Remember, we gravitate toward what we speak, even if its in the privacy of our own mind. Instead, take a rock-solid inventory of your entire self all the good qualities as well as taking responsibility for those things you would like to change. By taking stock in reality, you open the door to what is possible. Inventory all of your life experiences the triumphs, the personal storms that have shaped you and shown you so much about who you truly areand what is meaningful to you. You were brought through all of it for a reason what is it?
Remember you are only trying to prove to others what you are really trying to prove to yourself. In some ways this is helpful because you are telling yourself where you want to be. However, oftentimes we dont give ourselves credit for being a “good enough” friend, worker, spouse or parent. We might see things in black and white (read wonderful and horrible) so theres no room in between for us to be. Keep it reasonable and doable.
Through self-awareness to self acceptance we can then own all of our inner beauty that unique mosaic that has a purpose in this world. So, the next time you walk into a room, think about how much you would like for your genuine, peaceful self that truly embraces life to shine.