Does Your Self-Image Need a Makeover?

By Jennifer Beall, LCPC, LCADC

Jennifer Beall Psychotherapy

. http://jenniferbeallpsychotherapy.com/

More Cancer Awareness Articles

Does Your Self-Image Need a Makeover?

Many of us are unnecessarily limited by what we think of ourselves. We've kept ourselves in the boxes we were put into a long time ago, whether or not we really fit into them.
It's been said that children are great observers, but poor interpreters. When you're a kid, it's easy to take something and misunderstand it or blow it out of proportion. A kid doesn't hear a parent's negative comment and think, “Well, Mommy probably didn't mean that she had a bad day today.”
Young children believe they are the center of the universe and that they are the cause of everything that happens. For instance, a child whose parents get a divorce is likely to assume that there is something terribly wrong with him that caused his parents to fight and to separate.
As we grow up, we continue to live by the unspoken (and often incorrect) assumptions that we made so long ago.
If you have low self-esteem, start paying attention to the things you think and say about yourself. Notice when you call yourself (or something you do) stupid. Notice when you make fun of yourself or criticize a decision you've made. It's also not a bad idea to choose someone you trust and ask him or her to call your attention to these things when you say them.
Look at what you believe about yourself, and try to be fair. Is it really true? And no matter how true it is, how much does it really say about you? Of course you have things you don't like about yourself, but do you also have things you do like about yourself?
It's difficult to change how you think and feel about yourself, and it doesn't generally happen overnight. It's likely that those self-criticisms will keep returning to you throughout your life; when they do, I recommend that you make note of them, then counter them with something more realistic.
One simple way to attract good things is to keep a “gratitude journal” and, every day, write down things that have gone well for you. You can also try acting self-confident even if you don't feel that way; others will likely react positively, and the positive reactions will help you feel better about yourself.
Take the advice that one of my colleagues once shared with me, and “don't believe everything you think.” It's high time you broke out of your box and started to live the life you want and deserve.